Mirror, mirror on the wall...

I face the mighty mirror and ask: " Mirror, mirror on the wall, tell me what is the source of that fair and firm belief in my core" and the noble mirror glitters as He answers, "it is you my powerful Queen, your source is your core, and can you ask for more?"
I simply can not...
There is this belief so serene, so sublime, so patient, so sure, so axiomatic, so unshaken...
I find myself on and off questioning, inventing impossbilities and  the unspoken and unuttered yet the loudest ever answer is crystall-clear everytime: it is and  it will be...all that you think as barriers are irrelevent everything will work as a cooperative component and time is a non-issue...

It is very well known that you desire this down to your very bones.

weekend of decadence

saldım çayıra, mevlam kayıra. bu kadar güzel bir söz olabilir mi??? ben iki gündür saldım. vücudumu:)) halbuki vücudum çooooook tatlı intikam projemin önemli bir parçası.muhohaaaa....ormanda avlanan vahşi hayvan vücudu gibi kıvrak ve atak olmalı ama şu anda çubuklu pijamasıyla televizyon seyreden löpçük teddy bear kıvamına doğru ilerliyor hızla. ve benim umurumda değil. çünkü bu haftasonu is the weekend of decadence. şu aptal makaleyi bitirene kadar her türlü, her miktar çikolata, (ha bir de çikolata çok tatlı geldiğinden ekmek arası yiyorum ben) en yağlı ve tuzlu patlamış mısırlar serbest...kahve eşliğinde: selülit kokteyli...Ama bu sıkıcılıkla başka türlü başa çıkmam mümkün değillll. bir nefes boşluğu açmak zorundayım, bir renk, bir tat, bir doku...
Pazartesi çukulata ve tatlı hayatımdan çıkıyor ve zaten ada ve yürüyüş ve bisiklet ve v.s...
Ama Pazartesi güzel olmak zorundayım hımm...nasıl çözeriz bunu, şöyle: bu yaşlarda bir dirhem et bin ayıp örtmekte . o zaman dikkat oraya çekile, uzun ve püfür püfür bir etek giyile...onun üstümde kalacağına emin oluna:))))))) böyle bir eteğim vardır umarım ki...üst taraf zaten şahane...
bu yaşların bir güzelliği de şu, ay bunu da kendime dert edemem halet-i ruhiyesi ki bayılıyorum...
neyse yediğim çukulatanın hadd ü hesabı yok, hakkaten yok. Bunlar bana hızla selülit, sivilce ve ayva göbek olarak geri dönmüş durumda. Hızla çünkü kahve bütün o vıcıkları vücudumda adeta bir Prusya askeri disipliniyle tutuyor...
Neyse hakkıyla bir decadannt week end geçireyim de....dibe vurunca yukarı çıkmak daha zevkli olur ve dipten güç alırsın vs...
acaba akşam ne yesem...
işte böyleaaa...

Butterflies fly

Now  is such an interesting time.
 For a long long time very strong passion and desire has been flowing through me...or in other words life has been flowing through me. To be burned and reborn from your ashes...it gets easier everytime and carries you far...time of stark contrast, let's say...
I was surely a strange child, I have always prayed for power...what does a little girl mean when she uses that huge word, power. What she meant has changed over time and it becomes clearer and clearer to her each and every day. And as it gets clearer we are becoming one. The road to power for sure, now I am sure, goes through the valleys of love, gentleness and kindness. The other forms of power that life has cause me to witness have all come tumbling down. They were weakness in disguise.
This period has triggered a list, a long and delicious list that I want to manifest. That is simply being alive, sweet butterflies fly around in delight as I imagine myself in the doing and having of all those things...I want my liberty, freedom now more than anything and I want to flirt and play with this wonderful world and nature...I want to teach this spirit to my daughter. I want her to take birds and butterflies seriously:)) I want her to be able to tap her inner worth easily...I want her to know that we are from a family of witch women and she knows:)) She only has to look inside...
I love this journey, it is sooooo delicious. I am sooooooooooooo thankful.
Now this summer I will be the Indiana Jones of Osman's dream, I will walk through the magical forests, dangerous dungeons, delicios stories, portrayals, myths and mysteries of the Empire, making delicious connections as I walk...I, with two of my dear friends that share the common iamginative currency with me...I am so lucky...
There is grace in surrender...I will just take my cosy and comfortable seat and watch all the things that will take place, fully believing that manifestations will be much more delicious and wonderfull and sunjoyfull that my wildest dreams...

Power is in the now:))